The pocket edition of Cocktails for Dummies

It appears that my MIL knows me all to well. We just got yet another box of delightful Christmas suprises and my Christmas gift was delightfully wrapped in a ziploc baggie complete with name tag. Inside was the pocket edition of Cocktails for Dummies and on the inside cover was a handwritten note: "Geralyn, this is the best I could do, can't ship booze." What in the hell does that mean? Marc got a big box of mixed nuts which seems shockingly appropriate since he is my MIL son, but honestly, a box of nuts???

So, does this mean my MIL thinks I am a drunk and my husband a nut? Of course, 5 years ago when they came to visit us right after we moved to North Dakota, I did pack an igloo cooler with beer and parked it in my bedroom closet. Madison walked in on me, while I was sitting in the closet enjoying a tall cool Corona, and asked why I was doing that and I simply explained that murdering someone is wrong I couldn't bear to live in prison. Perhaps my MIL knew about my little secret and has interpreted that to mean I am a raging alcoholic? Who knows, but at least know I am the proud owner of the pocket edition of Cocktails for Dummies and I can now whip up a mean Bolero.

Bolero: 1 1/2 oz Barbancort rum (Haitian)
1/2 oz calvados
2 tsp sweet vermouth
dash bitters
Stir and serve straight up or on the rocks.

Holiday cheers to everyone!

Why me?????

We got an interesting package from my MIL yesterday. Opening it up and discovering what was inside was one of the great joys of my life. Now in all honesty, she did phone me a few days ago to tell me this package was heading our way to open it up right away and not to wait. Oh, the suspense was building and like always...Pop, goes the lead balloon.

Inside were 6 placements, not matching of course, that we recognized from her kitchen table, still complete WITH SPILLED FOOD!!!! GROSS! Also completing this lovely array of gifts, were sticker sheets for the kids with several stickers missing, factory second shirts, a beer can chicken roaster thingy mabob for me, and one pair of Jedi warrior anklets for the taking. She also tucked in a couple (actually cute) kitchen dish towels, that I am pretty sure I gave her a few years back. And less I forget, she included Richnigthder's birthday gift.....not late or anything since his birthday was October 14th.

What is up with this crap? Am I the only one who shares the sentiment that I would much rather just get a card, than a box full of #*&%?????

I've decided to be unrealistic and demanding this Christmas

This year I want Santa to bring me a Mercedes in black, with a big red bow on the top. I would also like a week away, ALONE, preferably in the Cayman Islands. I would like to do nothing but lie on a beach with a beautiful cabana boy catering to my whims and bringing me an endless river of intoxicating beverages. I want sunny skies and absolutely no one to try and make friendly chit-chat. I want to bring some books and read them until I fall asleep without interruptions.

A few years back, Marc learned a valuable lesson in gift giving......never buy the cheapest thing at Tiffany and Co. Since then he has been a champ in choosing lovely little bobbles that fit my fingers and earlobes. This year, since I have my family complete and all under one roof, I want to be totally unrealistic and unreasonable, so Santa, listen up and bring me that beautiful black Mercedes!! BUT, in the event that you are unable to wrap that up, then please refer back to the Tiffany website and get me the earrings I already bookmarked. They would look outstanding on my ears with my new haircut. HINT HINT HINT HINT HINT xoxoxoxoxo

The tree is up, the ground is white and the picture is taken!!

Carlos, hiding in the dryer. Richnigthder with gucci, Jerome with Carlos, Madison
Pebbles and Thomas with Kitty and Bunny

We have the tree upright, in the stand and Marc is actively working on getting the lights on in a way that looks attractive and not just thrown on in a helter-skelter fashion. The new puppies, Bunny and Kitty are doing their best to tear it down by eating the lower branches and actually dragging the 9 foot tree and stand across the room. Sweet little puppies ;-)!

Madison spent 3 hours in the emergency room last Friday for a snowboarding accident that occured right here in our front yard. I was inside on the phone getting some juicy gossip on a gal that is notouriosly nasty, when Madison came bursting thru the front door screaming her shoulder was hurt. I made all the typical hand gestures and finger snapping to let her know I was on the phone and to be quiet, yet her crying persisited. I got off the phone and realized her arm did seem to genuinely hurt, so off we went to the hospital, with Richnigthder and Jerome in tow.

Poor kid actually did dislocate her shoulder and break her collarbone, so I'm glad i got off the phone and took her in when I did. Yes, you may wonder how could she fall and hurt herself on our little tiny slope in the front yard.............Welllllll, seems she sprayed non-stick cooking spray on the bottom of the snowboard and whoosh, she was off, literally!

Today we did Christmas pictures with the 4 kids and 5 dogs. It was snowing lightly and the wind was just starting to pick up, so I think it turned out ok for a home photo. One or two of the pictures seem acceptable given that it was painful to get the kids and dogs to sit and face the camera at the same time.