tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-63943905704791282552024-02-20T07:43:30.095-06:00Life in Mini apple.....us!Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger341125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-33284039798628741002014-10-05T21:44:00.000-05:002014-10-05T21:44:46.638-05:00You know what's really interesting?Some things defy logic. Well, actually lots of things do. What I can't wrap my head around is why some one for the itty bitty North Dakota town of Wilton keeps visiting my blog.<br />
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Why on earth would someone from that ink-spot-on-a-map kind of town keep visiting my blog? <br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-17241405256756170212014-09-26T13:51:00.000-05:002014-09-26T13:51:50.270-05:00a life that hung on a triggerI can't share too much detail, or maybe any at all, but Marc came home the other day with a story to tell. Our perception of how the incident played out is tainted especially in light of the recent police officer shooting in South Carolina.<br />
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Suffice it to say, Marc was on the scene of some search warrants being executed by his agency as well as several other agencies. He was in his work vehicle which looks like every single other GMC you see on TV shows being driven by a fed. The next thing he knows he had a large semi automatic weapon pointed at his face. He identified himself and showed his badge and credentials and the day proceeded as normal. He could have been killed by friendly fire in the blink of an eye.<br />
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We both wonder, without casting any prejudicial thoughts towards the other agent, if the outcome would have been the same had Marc been a black or Hispanic man? Would they had given Marc the nano second to identify himself and produce his badge? I am not blaming the other agent for his actions.....I have not nor will I be able to walk in his shoes.....but I do know that I was happy at that moment that Marc knew enough to only respond verbally and not make a movement. What if Marc had been a black man? Would he have been given the benefit of the doubt?<br />
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I am a mother to 3 young black men. I worry especially for my 16 year old. I worry if he wears a hoody into a store. No one should have that fear. Sadly it stays in my gut where I tell him to take the hoody off when in a store or in a crowd. I hate living with doubt that someone will treat my boys fairly. This should not be a fear of any parent in our country today.<br />
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I said something disgusting and vile yesterday. When Marc told me about his encounter, I said, "Thank God you're white." I meant it! It may, or may not have been what kept the other agent's finger from pulling the trigger. I don't know the other agent. I can't judge him or any prejudice he may have. All I know is that Marc was at the other end of the gun and his life hung in the balance of his reactions and those of the man with his finger on the trigger. <br />
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I hate being afraid for my black boys to be out and about in this world without me, their white mom, there to mitigate any possible problems. How can I simultaneously teach them to be proud of being themselves while teaching them how to behave if they encounter bigotry or police questioning? I hate, hate, being afraid for them.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-14301147043778982192014-05-01T20:42:00.000-05:002014-05-01T20:42:37.358-05:00High Gear, warp speed, and overdrive!You know what? I still cringe when people mention North Dakota. I'm not sure if that reaction will ever leave any of us. If your getting tired of hearing about it, rest assured we are tired of feeling this way.<br />
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I don't know if we'll ever fully put behind us the feeling of betrayal we felt when our pastor turned his back on the racism our kids were experiencing at church and in the parsonage. He heard our kids called the N word and yet he never, ever dealt with this. Because of this we have yet to be able to return to a church....any church.<br />
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However this situation caused us to have a profound effect on our faith. We know for certain that God looked out for us and got us away those who pretend to be one thing, yet quietly lack ANY moral backbone. <br />
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In fact North Dakota is so negative to us that when we traveled out to Missoula to visit our friends in March, we drove the longer route and went across South Dakota and Wyoming solely to avoid having to set foot in N.D. But we have all become stronger due to others' bigotry. <br />
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We had a brief get-together with some of our Renegade friends in Montana and got to meet the newest Renegade. He's a delightful, happy little baby and I'm so glad I got to smoosh on him when he was just an itty bitty newborn. The kids had a rockin' good time as usual together and the grown ups learned how to drink banned beverages in Styrofoam coffee cups.....just to stay sane while supervising our kids at the Tribal YMCA. <br />
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April came and went and saw Madison turn 17! We now have 2 college visits scheduled; one at Grinnell College in 2 weeks and one at San Jose State University next month. She also has Middlebury College and Sweet Briar College in the line up and somewhere down the list....Oregon State and Portland State. She wants to double major in International Relations and Arabic with a minor in Spanish. Her career goals remain set on the CIA and I firmly believe this kid can do it.<br />
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Marc continues to love his DEA office here and enjoys that its a much larger office than the one in Bismarck. He's busy, but being the boss allows him to be home with more consistency. YEAH!<br />
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Richnigthder has made the travelling baseball team and the practices have already started. It will be a very busy summer with his schedule alone. Jerome remains happy...happy....happy! He's doing a summer day camp for a couple weeks and is really excited about it. Thomas is 6 months out now from his complete knee reconstruction surgery and you can't tell that he had a huge surgery. Now we wait until next fall to have the other knee done. He wants the summer to tear it up on his motorcycle....and I suppose have time to continue wrecking the bum knee even more. As for me, I don't have any time for myself. I am constantly on the move keeping kids in check.<br />
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I did squeeze in a quick trip to Oregon with the little boys. They had never been there and had a great time with my 3 sisters, nieces and nephews. We went to a psychic and Tarot Card reader and that was a blast and shockingly dead on the money accurate. My sister Kathleen and her husband, Art just took a transfer to Little Rock and I am SO excited since it is the first time in 10 years that I have had family closer than 1500 miles. For us it will be a straight shot down I-35 and I can't wait to spend a holiday with them.<br />
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Now I'm off to order Madison's cheerleading outfit. Yep. In addition to Dressage, Speech Team, and <br />
writing for the school paper, she's made the Varsity Cheerleader team. Good God this house is in high gear and constantly moving. And secretly, I love it!<br />
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-20557382709508836672013-10-17T16:08:00.000-05:002013-10-17T16:08:29.968-05:00College visits, applesauce and fall foliageThe trees in Southern Minnesota are deliciously colorful right now. The rolling hills and bluffs are swaddled in hues of gold, red, orange, brown and purple. We have been deprived of the glory of the fall season having lived in North Dakota where our 80 acres had a total of ONE tree. Sadly, that one tree would go from having some nice bright, green leaves to completely bare in about an hour and a half. <br />
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Madison and I traveled 60 miles down Hwy 61 to Winona, Minnesota today. It follows the Mississippi River and the bluffs that surround it on both the Minnesota side and the Wisconsin side. It was a beautiful drive with the trees in full color. Our journey to Winona was Madison's first college visit/tour. Winona State University is a pretty campus nestled at the bottom of the Mississippi bluffs, along the river and is resplendent in color right now. The campus is about 10,000 students and seems to comprise a fair amount of diversity, which is important to Madison after having lived through the single ethnic lack-of-diversity experienced in North Dakota. <br />
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We saw the important things on campus and culminated in the bookstore where she bought a sweatshirt. I asked if she had chosen this as her one and only college and she informed me that she plans on getting a sweatshirt at every college we visit. Whew! That kid will have a lot of hoodies by the end of this Spring! <br />
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She also took her PSAT yesterday which is another sign to me that I am indeed past my college fun-in-my-prime days. I had to keep reminding her that the cute guys were checking me out and not her. How silly could she be? <br />
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I am now home, making applesauce with the abundance of apples that our trees gave us this year. The smell in here is unbelievable! So I'm pretty sure that my day today qualifies me for Mom-of-the-Year status. I've watched my first born tour her first college, helped her prepare for her PSAT, marveled at the beauty of fall, and lamented her approaching college days while making applesauce. If only all my days were this contemplative.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-32155138474662965622013-10-02T14:50:00.000-05:002013-10-02T14:50:16.685-05:00All work and no pay equals our realityMarc has the distinct pleasure of working every single day for our federal government without pay now. He gets to go and put his life potentially in harms way all without the benefit of a pay check. If I seem disgruntled, it's because I am. Marc doesn't get bonuses, overtime pay, or comp. time. He also hasn't had a pay raise in more than 3 years. And now, he gets to go to work and not even have the promise of a paycheck.<br />
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I'm embarrassed to be an American right now. Our Congressional members are punishing the citizens because they refuse to work towards a solution. Why is the word 'compromise' viewed as a negative? Why is compromise viewed as a weakness? I do know that we would not be in this position if the members of congress were denied a paycheck until a resolution was found. This is hard to believe. Who are those elected officials working for? Too bad we can't decide to vote for no pay for them! <br />
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Rant over. Now continue on!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-84716597326879681892013-07-03T12:30:00.002-05:002013-07-03T12:30:48.084-05:00What some failed to learn in KindergartenI won't dwell on the Paula Deen fiasco. It's been hashed out and debated enough. People from both sides of the camp have eloquently stated their beliefs, albeit, some with more credibility than others.<br />
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My take on this is simple. The N word is never, ever acceptable. It is a vile word that objectifies black people as objects and negates their humanism. I know the arguments put forth by those that try to justify its usage: the primary assertion is that since blacks use the N word amongst themselves, that fact alone lends itself to its acceptability in our language. Do black people use that word...why yes they do. Does that make it alright and an acceptable word in our vernacular?.....Why no it doesn't. I believe that as the N word persisted throughout the generations, blacks used the words amongst themselves as a way of 'claiming' the word. If they claimed the word and used it, then maybe it would diminish the sting felt when a white person would use it towards them. Like I said, that's my personal belief of why some black people use the word. Do I think it's right? No I don't.<br />
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I think that any person using the word lowers themselves to that of a ignorant person who doesn't possess the knowledge to choose better words. It really, really pisses me off to hear the N word uttered by anyone. <br />
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My kids have heard this said to them in North Dakota. They heard it directed towards them at the parsonage. They heard the church council president tell us that he has used the N word and finds it acceptable. Let me tell you that hearing that word directed at your children is so hurtful it's actually a physical pain. I thought my heart with burst with sadness. I don't know why or how some people can still justify its usage today.<br />
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For the love of God people. It's 2013. Did you not learn in Kindergarten that two wrongs do not make a right? Just because someone else does something does not mean it's right or acceptable. Why can't we go back to the golden days of Kindergarten where name calling is a no-no and treating others the way you want to be treated is the rule? Now, everyone sit on your carpet square, criss-cross applesauce, and listen to the morning story about the brave new generation where regardless of skin color there is no name calling and everyone tries to get along.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-56427464081115864402013-06-20T16:13:00.000-05:002013-06-20T16:13:30.271-05:00Homesick at homeWe had the best week ever with our friends here. We had old friends and new friends. We had 35 people and 15 kids. It was a week full of laughter, good belly aching laughter, liquor and inside jokes. 18 of us stayed in this house for a week and we all got along without a hiccup.<br />
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The chaos that existed in this house earned the nick name of the frat house. In all honesty, it was like Animal House. We had dishes in the flower pots out front, underwear in the driveway, a horse trough of water for water guns in the driveway, a broken window from a wayward baseball, red solo cups freaking everywhere, a recycling can full of liquor bottles, little boys peeing off the deck, a 24 pack of toilet paper by the front door.....that's a mystery to me....and a stampede thru the front yard of a herd of cows and last but not least, two emergency room visits.<br />
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The enclosed sun room/porch became the Renegade Lounge. It's where we did the best story telling, drinking and laughing. We laughed to the point that we kept the 12 children awake who pointed out that they couldn't sleep because of our loud laughter. As a collective group, we told stories that are now legendary. After all of our stories and laughter, we reached the unanimous conclusion that we are the normal families! All of us passed extensive and thorough backgrounds to be given the privilege to parent our children through adoption. We also realized we might just all be going straight to hell because of our humor.<br />
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Hell or not, I'll enjoy my company there. Our friends are our family, the ones who will raise our children should we die, and I couldn't imagine them being raised by any other families more like us than the Watkins and Dorcheus's. To all of our Renegade families, we anxiously await next year to see you all again and to share more fun and love. We love you all and can't wait for next summer and a repeat of the intense fun.<br />
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Stories of adventures to follow. Stay tuned.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-53875784388422337142013-06-09T09:16:00.002-05:002013-06-09T09:16:20.176-05:00Let the fun beginSimply put, tomorrow our dear friends invade, um, er, I mean come to visit for a week or so. All of us Laurie's are so excited that we feel like kid's on Christmas Eve. I'm busy cleaning the house, the barn and the arena so the kids have places to play and get into trouble. Today I'll get the laundry done and try to keep the house tidy until they arrive. After that, I have no expectations.<br />
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The volleyball net is up. Madison and her boyfriend Tyler, Thomas and Richnigthder played a quick game last night at 9PM and ended quickly when Madison clothes-lined herself on Tyler's outstretched arm. It was freakin' hilarious. The soccer cones are set up for the Haitian sensations and I bought a bucket of baseballs for the kids to hit around......Way far away from the house for the window's sake....picked up some Frisbees and some nerf balls. Buying all this stuff almost guarantees that not a single ball will be played with. They'll most likely be running thru the dark and mysterious woods looking for dead things and collecting ticks all over their bodies.<br />
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I've got so much to do and yet I sit here with great anticipation about the fun and chaos just ahead. We are so grateful to have such wonderful friends and to be able to meet up with some regularity. It was just 11 months ago when we attempted our trip to Flathead Lake only to end up stranded in Butte, Montana. Little did we know a family legend was born of that Griswold vacation. Ever since that trip, for some odd reason, our kids think that it's normal for family vacations to visit historic brothels. Where do my weird kids get such messed up ideas? Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-9734012346215220062013-05-30T17:33:00.003-05:002013-05-30T17:33:40.136-05:00Shining ThroughMany of you know the extreme racism that we experienced at church back in North Dakota. It was a disgusting situation that would shock anybody in current times, or for that fact, anybody that believes we as humans are made in the image and likeness of God. The pain we felt at the time was immeasurable. <br />
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We feel like we've collectively come through the gates of hell and have landed in a place of refuge. While no place is perfect, we feel good to be here. The kids have settled in and our summer is packed with people visiting and kids' camps and sports. Looking forward is good for us, and not looking backward. <br />
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I prayed like crazy during that difficult time. I prayed with fervor like I've only done a handful of times in my 4 decades + of life. Out of our heartache and gut-punch came good things. Things we are still trying to wrap our brains around. But even though we are happy and settled, we still have these lingering feelings of fear, panic, and entrapment that spring to the for front of our minds. I was talking to a new friend here and she labeled the feelings as PTSD. <br />
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I never gave the feelings a title, but I feel it's accurate. Out of the 9 years we lived in North Dakota, we worked hard to blend in and adapt to our new living environment. We gave of our time and sacrificed family time to help our new community. No matter how hard we worked and volunteered, we were kept at arms length by the 'locals'. We laughed about it then. We joked that we would never be accepted as residents since we were not born on our great grandfathers farm, attend the two room schoolhouse, the church your family helped build, marry your neighbor who lives on the farm next door, send your kids to the same two room schoolhouse and then die in the house in which you were born. Living and dying on one road in North Dakota. <br />
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Our family was just too much for them to integrate. What happened at our church was a slap in the face and hindsight offers a perspective we weren't able to grasp at the moment. We would have continued to change who we were in the hopes of being accepted by people who made it abundantly clear would never have fully accepted us as friends and neighbors.<br />
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What we learned from this experience is that while it is necessary to acclimate to whatever culture you might be living in, it's not good to lose sight of who you are. Our family did a little introspection and realized some key traits that we have. As a family we are kind and generous, have great sense of humours, and are proud to be an atypical appearing lot. Not a single one of us are related by DNA, yet we have a cohesiveness that would try any of those 'one road' families in North Dakota.<br />
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We look back on our life in North Dakota and are immensely happy to be outta there. I learned a lot about myself there. I learned that the people of rural North Dakota are some of the friendliest people around........... if you look just like them and have similar 'one-road-life stories' to share. Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-10423337046224627612013-05-12T14:55:00.000-05:002013-05-12T14:55:18.331-05:00It's a Good FitPicking up where I left off yesterday brings us to the frantic week before Christmas. Oh was that a mad dash! Fortunately we no longer lived in the land of desperation and nothingness....North Dakota. We have so many choices here from grocery stores to tack stores to department stores. St. Paul and Minneapolis have it all. It feels so good to be back among a population of diversity and choices. <br />
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I frantically dashed through stores to get the things the kids had asked for and was pleased to have more than one Target and Walmart in which to shop. We are 33 miles from the Mall of America and it offers just about anything anyone could ever want. Of course my favorite store there is Nordstrom and it was like the Mother Ship had called me home.<br />
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After Christmas, I rang in the New Year with Influenza A. Oh was that a special treat. I had a 104 degree temp for 2 days and then it began to drop. I went to our local hospital/clinic which is a Mayo Clinic and they were nice enough to prescribe Tamiflu for everyone else in the family which I know prevented them from getting it too. The end of January Marc left for two weeks to go to Washington D.C. Naturally, we had an ice storm which meant Madison had several snow days from school and that left me with 4 arguing kids at home. UGH<br />
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February was Jerome's birthday and Marc's and for Jerome's bday, Victoria joined us from UND. My PEO friend, Bonnie and her daughter, Hallie joined us from Bismarck. Jerome had never been to a Chuck E. Cheese so we indulged him and tortured ourselves and took everyone to a chaotic, filthy, over-crowded pizzeria where a large mouse leads children around like the pied piper. Victoria ended up getting sick from the disgusting place and after taking her to the doctor, she had Strep. She left our place after staying a week and still was not feeling well, but headed back to UND. Once there she discovered she still had Strep and in addition, Mono. <br />
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My birthday rolled around in March and I was somewhat indulgent with myself. I went with Marc to Sears so he could get a $10 part for the snow blower, and while he was getting that, I wandered over to the large appliances. While he was buying that, I bought a new fridge. It was a really good deal and the French doors function much better in this kitchen than the other fridge. Then we went to the auto show and I kind of liked a couple of cars. I came home and researched them and lo and behold, we ended up buying a new car on my birthday. I love my new Durango and it too seats 7 so there is room for our newest family member, Victoria.<br />
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April saw Madison turn 16. While she has had a valid North Dakota driver's license since she was 15, Minnesota does not license persons under 16 so as soon as she was 16 we went in to take our driver's tests here. Seems Minnesota has a weirdo rule that licensed drivers from other states must take a written knowledge test to get a license. I'm happy to report that Marc and I got 94% and our smarty pants kid got a 99%. <br />
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Madison also has a new boyfriend. He seems like a nice young man and always picks her up and drops her off without being late. He's polite and respectful and she enjoys spending the afternoons at his house after school. I like that his dad is home while they are there and he seems to be a plugged-in kind of dad. I like that.<br />
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May brings up the end of the school year for Madison who started public school in January here in Cannon Falls. She's doing VERY well. I'm so proud of her being on the honor roll and for taking her AP and honor's classes. My baby is even getting an A- in algebra. Tomorrow we head back to Mayo which is 40 miles south of us so she can have her two impacted wisdom teeth removed. I'm so glad we are so close to Mayo for all of our healthcare needs. After living in North Dakota where the medical care left something to be desired, we are ecstatic to be so near world class healthcare. <br />
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The horses are out in the fields grazing happily. Madison has enjoyed having an indoor riding arena and still uses it even in the nicer weather since two sides of the arena slide open. The dogs love the huge fenced in dog area and the kids have enjoyed exploring the woods that surround our house. We have confirmed that there are indeed two mountain lions that live in the woods surrounding us, a den of wolves, badgers in our field and the most annoying of all....a woodchuck. He's eating the beautiful aspens and his little whistle like chirping is my morning wake up call. I really hate that large rodent. The bald eagles are abundant here and sitting on the front porch is such a treat watching them soar on the wind. <br />
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This is our new life here in Minnesota. Marc LOVES, LOVES, LOVES his new office and all the people he works with in the office here. He's a happy camper. We are working on letting the wounds and hurt feelings we experienced at church in ND scab over and begin their migration to the back of our minds. The kids are still too scared to attend church here for fear of experiencing bullying, racism and a weak pastor, but I think we might be on the track to finding a church that feels right. I think in time, Madison and Thomas will come around. <br />
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We look forward to June with lots of excitement. We have a large group of friends coming who have all adopted kids from the same orphanage that our little boys came from and all 40 of us will be doing fun things like a Twin's baseball game, Mississippi River boat trip, the Spam museuem and other 'normal' things. Who knows? Maybe we'll head to another historic brothel. Ah memories. <br />
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Life in Minnesota for us, has been good. It's like slipping on an old shoe that you forgot you had and finding it still fits great and feels good. <br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-46218104152143833322013-05-11T17:21:00.001-05:002013-05-11T17:21:18.764-05:00ordinary is good.So very much has happened since my last posting. I suppose I'll start with the big move and work forward from there.<br />
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The movers showed up and got us completely packed in 3 days instead of the 4 they anticipated it would take. Then they loaded all of our possessions into the truck in 2 days. We actually had a pretty good move this time. Nothing was broken and nothing turned up missing. Yeah. The moving truck departed the day before we did and of course as we hit the road, we looked like the Beverly Hill Billies. <br />
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Marc drove the pickup and horse trailer which had the 4 mini's. In the living quarters of the trailer we had two large dog crates that contained our 8 cats. Marc also had one Sheltie and Richnigthder for company. I drove the Denali which had was stuffed to the gills with kids and animals. I travelled with Thomas, 2 Rottweilers and one Sheltie, two guinea pigs, and one rabbit. Madison drove the Mazda with Jerome, one sheltie and one rabbit. See what I mean about the hicks hitting the road.<br />
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We caravanned from Bismarck to Minneapolis. I led the way and we kept Madison between us as Marc brought up the rear in the truck and trailer. We had to make it to Minneapolis in enough time to get to the title company to sign the closing documents before the end of the business day so we really couldn't make a leisurely trip out of it. We drove 75MPH the whole way and pulled into the parking lot of the title company at 4:45 PM on December 13th. The kids stayed in the cars while Marc and I went in to sign the documents and finally got the keys to the new place. At 6:30 the three of us hit the road to navigate our way to the new house we had only been to twice before. Madison had never driven in city traffic, nor rush hour traffic in the dark so the trip was a little nerve-wracking for her. <br />
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We got to the new place and unloaded horses and animals and hit the hay....on the floor of course. The moving truck came the next day and it took them 15 hours to unload us. I finally sent them packing...no pun....and we began to settle in. Our dear, wonderful friends, Todd and Tami Iszler arrived the next day with our 6 large horses. They picked up our horses at our old place in Bismarck and then braved snowy, icy roads to make the 450 trip to Cannon Falls. Once the large horses were unloaded in the barn, the Laurie's were officially all present and accounted for in Minnesota.<br />
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More to come tomorrow! After all, I have 5 months to fill you in on.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-12235933130832934812012-12-05T20:32:00.000-06:002012-12-05T20:32:21.515-06:00Maybe I am that dumb?It's obvious that I've changed the name of my blog to more accurately reflect our new home and glee we feel about moving to Minneapolis, but I've got a small techno problem to work out.<br />
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Ok bloggers, I need some help. I tried to change the address of the blog to something more similar to the blog's name, but even after I changed it, I could never locate it by googling the new address. It came up with some old blogs with that address....guess mini apple us is not so unique after all....but I still find it witty and charming, so it's staying. It also came up with everything 'Apple' related, such as IPad's, but nothing with my blog. <br />
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So what's the scoop? Why could I not find my own damn blog with the new address? Why did I have to switch the address back to the whynorthdakota one?<br />
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I would love to cut all my ties to this glorious state, so any advice about this would be helpful. I know I have techno nerdy friends who can help me so I'm counting on you. Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-74468455760581948022012-12-05T08:31:00.001-06:002012-12-05T08:31:22.560-06:00A New Name, same old stuffFor both of my faithful followers, and I'm being optimistic, I've changed the title to reflect our new life. We are excited to say the least that we will be living amongst diversity of every kind again. <br />
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While we will actually be living in Cannon Falls, Minneapolis will be our home city. Hence from a much appreciated suggestion from a follower, I have chosen the new title to reflect our new locale.<br />
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Mini apple....lis! Get it? Minneapolis....Mini...apple...lis! Sheesh, do I need to spell it out? If you have another idea for a catchy title, let me know. Until then, I'm sticking with mini apples!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-19555220997069557022012-11-14T16:16:00.000-06:002012-11-14T16:16:25.473-06:00I'm not a tourist, I live hereWe've been to the Mall of America many times, but this time I was happy to claim that mall as my 'home' mall. Finally, after living 9 years in purgatory (North Dakota) we are returning to civilization again. Walking thru the mall on Sunday afternoon, I was annoyed by the mass of people there that were sight-seeing. Don't these people know that it's MY MALL? Sheesh<br />
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The movers come on December 10th and will spend two days packing us up and two days loading. We will be in our new home about December 14th and all of us are excited beyond word. Marc is really happy about his new office. We went into meet everyone there and Marc hit the jackpot! His office is on the 8th floor, and overlooks the Mississippi River. He has the enviable corner office with floor to ceiling windows and a couch and occasional chairs. It's officially a big boy office. His agency occupies 34,000 square feet on the 7th and 8th floor and is really, really impressive. It's honestly a fully contained mini city. But the best part of his new office is.....wait......because of the building's location and the fact that he has underground parking, we can walk from there to the Twin's Stadium, the Timberwolve's venue and the Viking's Stadium. I have some very happy boys in my house right now!<br />
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Our new home is exactly 32 miles from the Mall of America. Trust me, Madison is pretty darn happy with that one! My Nordstrom card was used exhaustively the past 10 days and will enjoy future exercise. There is so much more to do and explore there than there is here.<br />
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I've had numerous people in Bismarck tell me what a great place Bismarck is to raise a family. All I can say to that is, that might be true if your family is homogeneously white. But if you have black kids, this is not the place I want my kids to grow up. I'm tired of people expressing out-rage at our racial incidents, but being too cowardly to make a stand for us and the 'right' thing. It takes a strong person stand up for those who have been maligned, but sadly, we haven't met any of those strong people in Bismarck. The incident at church this past summer was a true blessing. It brought to light the meek and cowardly nature of those whom we had once respected and pushed Marc's agency to move us quickly....and give him a promotion to boot!<br />
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We still marvel at the fabulous good fortune that came our way soon after the loss of our church family. From this, good things have continued and we can't wait to begin the next phase of our life. Change is good! More people need to embrace that belief. Isolation and insulation from change causes the narrow and spiteful, racial comments and ignorance we encountered. <br />
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The next few weeks will be busy, busy, busy. So busy that we might forget to be thankful to God for His blessings, but each time we get overwhelmed with all we have to get done, we remember that we could be stuck here and very bored and lonely. God is good and we look forward to sharing our new home and fabulous new city with our dear friends and family. To the Watkins and Dorcheus families, you will always, always have room in our home and we won't consider it our official new home until you have come and stayed with us and broken the house in with our collective gaggle of children. See you soon!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-78090768476671048312012-11-05T18:33:00.001-06:002012-11-05T18:33:36.878-06:00House hunting is for the birdsThis sucks! 10 days to find a new home is just not enough time. Today we looked at 4 houses scattered throughout the western edge of Minneapolis. We took our time and were methodical in sizing up each homes potential and likelihood of meeting our needs.<br />
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The first home was lovely and was by far the nicest house in the neighborhood.....which probably explains why it's been on the market 500+ days. Great house in a not so great neighborhood equals no resale value.<br />
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The second home has a fabulous barn and indoor riding arena. It also had a wonderful built in pool and was in a fantastic location. The house was nice, but needed a little up dating. What you ask, was the problem with this one? Well it had a small heaving problem where the patio foundation would heave up in the winter and drop back in the summer. Yep, not buying that problem no matter how nice the property.<br />
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The third house is in Buffalo and is a lovely, lovely home in a great small suburb of Buffalo, MN. It has a barn with 4 gorgeous stalls and we would have to add a few more, but completely doable. The house is move in ready. Great house. HUGE! BUT.....it seems to be a little over priced. We'll have to see about this one, but as of today it's number one on my list.<br />
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Fourth house was also a nice house...HUGE at 4800 square feet. Great jack-and-jill bath for the boys and a ginormous bedroom for Madison and bachelor pad for Thomas. A little further out than we would like, but it's on 22 acres but has no horse fencing and is close to a busy road. <br />
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Decisions, decision. One thing I do know is that Marc's government per diem for food is not nearly enough to cover happy hour needs. Cocktails are most needed when we must choose a home in a few days. Mas bebidas, por favor!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-17843070463366710202012-10-29T17:41:00.000-05:002012-10-29T17:41:17.133-05:00Where my kids can just be kidsThe excitement in our household is building as we get closer to our move. We head out on our house hunting trip this week and will probably pack a month's worth of looking, investigating, searching, shopping, negotiating and eating into a few days. <br />
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We have had two appraisals, a home inspection, a pest inspection and a septic tank inspection done on this house for the relocation company which will ultimately purchase our house from us. So far everything is moving smoothly. We've had two offers on our house, but we were unable to accept one offer since it was contingent upon the sale of their current home and the other people, well, let's just say they weren't living in the real world. Their offer was a little low and they wanted us to pay their closing costs and give them all our mineral rights. UM, that would be a huge NO!<br />
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Mineral rights are the hot topic these days in North Dakota. As oil and gas exploration expands south and east of the Bakken, everyone who owns land and the mineral rights are reserving their rights due to the potential for huge income on those minerals. I guess some people enjoy living in la la land with Tipsy and Po. <br />
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The greater Minneapolis area has a glut of houses that fit our needs. We are looking for a home on at least 10 acres, horse ready with a barn and a 4 bedroom house. So far our realtor there has matched us with 136 house within a 40 mile radius of downtown Minneapolis. From that list we have whittled it down but we really can't know if a house will 'feel' right until we can see the surrounding area and get a feel for the town. We most certainly do not want to repeat our circumstances that have occurred here with small town/small minded bigots, so getting there and getting a feel for the neighborhood will be so important. <br />
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The moving company is pushing us to lock in the specific date that we want them to show up and load us. It's been hard to do since we aren't sure when we'll close on a new house in Minnesota or Wisconsin. We know Marc must be at work there on December 19th so we are guessing the movers will be here around the 13th. GULP! They estimate 2 days to pack and 2 days to load. Once there they are paid to unpack us...which they did not do last time and literally just dropped our stuff and left. This time I'm not going to be a nice Nelly. I'm gonna be wicked Nelly Olson from Little House on the Prairie!<br />
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I'm still not complaining. Really I'm not. I'm so damn happy to be getting out of here and leaving a community behind that resists new comers no matter how hard they work to adapt and blend with the old timers. We look forward to blending into a big city again where my kids won't be stared at simply because of their skin color. A diverse enough city where my kids can just be kids. Not the black kids with the white parents. Just simply kids.<br />
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Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-84208795339776885152012-10-11T20:51:00.004-05:002012-10-11T20:51:51.681-05:00Moving on up..to the East side....AKA, Minneapolis!It was pointed out to me by <a href="http://tinahollenbeck.blogspot.com/">Tina</a>,<span style="color: black;"> that due to our impending move to the greater Minneapolis/St. Paul area, I would need to change the title of my blog. YIPPEEE! </span><br />
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I am utterly lacking in creativity. Even though I am a Pisces, I still missed out on the creative aspects I was supposed to have been born with. Nope, nada, zilch creative ideas originate in my noggin. So darlin' blogland readers, help me come up with a new title for my blog. <br />
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We've hooked up with a realtor in Minneapolis and we are also looking at properties in the Hudson, Wisconsin area. Funny thing though is that the property taxes are much higher than in the surrounding counties of Minneapolis with the exception of Hennepin County which are outrageous. So with that in mind, even though Marc will be working in Minneapolis we very well could be living in Minnesota or Wisconsin. Toss out the ideas for a new blog title....Please...I need help here!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-61699985603555694462012-09-28T17:37:00.000-05:002012-09-28T17:37:10.033-05:00Whew, what a summer, but a GREAT fall is aheadWell most of you know what transpired with our family and the hateful, bigoted racism that was directed to our family....and blatantly ignored by others....in this small backwards community, but out of that has come some true blessings. Let me share some of the outstanding good fortune and blessings given by God that will benefit our family.<br />
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First of all, Marc's agency stepped up to the plate and intervened in hearing our pleas for help living in this community and worked diligently to transfer our family ASAP. Well, the big kahuna's in the government not only got us a transfer to our city of choice, but also gave Marc a promotion! In addition, they are relocating us in only 90 days. Well, it's actually 83 days now since we've known for a week now, but who's counting? We've already begun the process of listing the house, getting it show ready, and signing up with the relocation company. If our house doesn't sell in 30 days then the relo company buys it and we leave this hideous state behind. <br />
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It's funny how the cowardice of other people and their hateful words and actions caused us so much emotional pain at the time, but ultimately brought us to a better place. A better place emotionally, financially and vastly more diverse so that my family will not be surrounded by ignorant, mean-spirited people. <br />
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Marc informed the people he works with here in Bismarck and they are sad to see him leave, but understand the terrible hatred our family has been experiencing. Someday soon, the people of this state will have to come to terms with people living in 'their' community of different races. It's despicable for people to idly stand by and witness racism and fail to address it, condemn it and intervene. Sadly, the vast majority of the people here have acknowledged that our family has been subjected to racism, yet are too weak of character to stand up and publicly declare it as an abhorrent behavior. We've made excuses for years now for the people who privately tell us it's wrong what our children hear spoken to them, but will not stand with us in public in an effort to change it. Weak people...cowards...come in all shapes, sizes, ages, religions, and occupations. Maybe we're just unlucky but we have encountered bigots matching all these demographics. <br />
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While we know racism is alive and kicking everywhere, our new location will definitely provide us with a metropolitan city where the population has actually lived somewhere else than the good 'ol family farm in rural North Dakota. North Dakota is quickly being pushed out of it's cherished isolationism and will soon need to deal with real world problems. We as a family are ecstatic beyond belief that we are moving and leaving this hate filled community behind.<br />
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As much as I hate painting, I must continue to touch up the white baseboards, dings in the walls and repaint the back door. When I get so frustrated trying to keep the house spotless (what a joke with 4 kids) I simply remind myself that we have a deadline to be in place in our new state, the movers are coming to pack us up and we can blow a ginormous raspberry to the narrow-minded lifer's as we fly away to a new beginning.<br />
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Out of ashes and heartache came blessings for our family. My faith in God is as strong as ever and we look forward to the future with great excitement and zeal. To those who maligned us, thank you! Your spiteful, cowardly natures have blessed us beyond belief.Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-45547478403788054922012-07-18T12:37:00.003-05:002012-07-18T12:37:53.772-05:00Going privateI will be taking my blog off the grid soon. If you would like to continue to follow, please email me or leave a comment and I will make sure you can continue to join me on this most unique adventure that our family is on. Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-87902980592222163272012-07-16T21:11:00.000-05:002012-07-16T21:11:03.545-05:00WelcomeIn honor of all my new readers, I decided to change my outdated background. I hope it adds an air of summer time joy!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-36070596459766332902012-07-02T16:45:00.002-05:002012-07-02T16:45:28.015-05:00The sting of losing a churchMarc and Madison returned Friday evening from a 10 day youth group trip from church. The name of this trip and the ones taken in the previous years are called faith adventure trips. This years trip jouryned to New York City where we believed the kids (14-18 year olds) would be involved in charity service work of one kind or another. After a 3 day bus ride from North Dakota to NYC, the kids and chaperones disembarked at their 'hostel' which had 2 people per room, with one person on a roll-a-way bed and 2 bathrooms on each floor serving about 30 strangers. GAG!<br />
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It quickly became obvious that out of the 6 days spent in NYC, only 3 days had any type of service work involved. Marc figured that including travel time on the subways to reach the soup kitchens, the total amount of time spent in service to others was a mere 5 hours! Now in my world, 5 hours does not constitute substantial community giving. Let along having to travel by bus for 30 hours in each direction to participate in 5 hours of charitable giving. I know first hand that there are several places right here in Bismarck where these kids could put some sweat into serving others!<br />
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Lots of things are bothering us about this so called Faith Adventure. First of all, when asked why the prefered method of transportation was by bus, the pastor informed Marc that it was not only cheaper, but allowed for team building exercises to take place in transit...to solidfy the group. COUGH, I call BS on this one. Seems there was actually NO team building exercises that occured in transit at all. Another little thing that annoys me is that while yes, they were in NYC, the over-whelming vast majority of the time was spent sight-seeing. While I do agree that the kids from our church have led narrow lives, with few having traveled anywhere in the USA before and most having never flown on a plane...sad but true....the pastor also wanted to expose these kids to cultural differences. God knows these kids need that. Most of the local kids still look at my kids and call them wooly because of their hair, and ask stupid questions about their skin. At worst, these kids have called my kids the N word and spoken freely at the parsonage about shooting "coons." They've told racist jokes to my kids on previous church outings and joked about how my kids shouldn't be able to swim, but could sure shoot hoops. We've tolerated and tried valiantly to educate the local kids to no avail. Some are quiet in their bigotry and some are blatant, neither of which feels good.<br />
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So on this journey, Marc got to witness first hand how the girls bullied Madison. Madison simply aint no shrinkin' violet, for damn sure, but even she can only take so much. Marc watched the girls make fun of her curly hair, listened to them as they told her that the roommate would take the bed and Madison would have to deal with the roll-a-way, and watched as the girls ostracized Madison at Times Square and told her that they would be going off sight-seeing without her. Marc was a good Dad and picked up the slack when all she wanted was to be accepted by narrow-minded, frightened girls. That night at devotions with the group, Marc was asked where he had seen the face of God. He replied, "I know where I DIDN'T see the face of God, and that was in the young girls who have mocked and shunned Madison to the point of tears." One of the girls to whom Marc was referring had a Mom along as a chaperone who instead of acknowledging this issue chose to give both Marc and Madison the cold shoulder for the remainder of the trip and refused to speak to them. <br />
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Marc brought this issue up to our pastor who shocked the hell out of us by telling Marc that this is normal girl behavior and he would not comment or talk to the girls since he hadn't seen it himself. He had been told by several people about the bullying, but chose to ignore it and not address it because I believe he(the pastor) too, is a chicken to stand up to the majority to take the cause of the minority. Marc called me from New York to share what our pastor had said, or failed to say, and we both feel that since this is a church trip, not a secular school trip and we both expect these kids from church to behave in a Christian manner. If this is a faith adventure then these kids better step up and bring a Christ like behavior with them, or stay at home.<br />
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We are sick feeling about this. To think that our pastor can call this behavior 'Normal girl behavior' is sickening. Since when do we as a church body, lower our standards and condone mean, ignorant behavior? Madison and Thomas experienced bullying in the private Christian school they were in for 3 years and then again in public school. Now as homeschoolers it's odd that my kids are experiencing the most egregious behavior from the people that compose their church family. <br />
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Madison came home with a new appreciation of how 'average' young teen girls treat each other. I am glad she is a strong, Strong young girl who can move beyond the slights and insults tossed her way, but it still leaves an invisible scar deep within. Marc and I have tried our best to live our values and morals as an example to our kids. We expect them to respect everyone. They may not like someone, but we still expect them to be civil. How is that our pastor can turn away, shirk his duty to teach and instill Christ like values to those in his charge when he knows this behavior is occuring? To avoid it with the casual thought that this is normal is to perpetuate its cruelty. <br />
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I am mad. I am sad and I feel lost in my spiritual journey. I refuse to let one man who happens to wear a collar, destroy my faith in God, but he has destroyed my faith in him and his ability to take a moral stand and correct those who are behaving in a despicable very un-Christ like manner. It's not often that Marc expresses his sadness and vunerability, but when it comes to our kids, that is our weak spot. How can we return to this church knowing our pastor, our shephard of our flock, perceives and condones this behavior as normal and acceptable? This is where we are right now. It's not a good place and it stings. Unknownnoreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-65474019723680082572012-06-17T12:26:00.002-05:002012-06-17T12:29:15.602-05:00hardballIn my last post, I wrote about how this ding bat lady wanted us to help her by reducing the price of our property so it was more comfortable for them to meet their payments. Well, against all odds, after that discussion with her, we raised our price again and got yet another bite on our property.<br />
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I emailed the first gal back and told her about the new interest and believe it or not, they have agreed to our asking price. I guess her comfort level could be expanded after all without my help!<br />
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We've never played hardball before and never intended too, but we too see this property sale as a chance to help fund our trip to Haiti to search for Richnigthder's family. We also intend on helping our friends, the Watkins family who are moving to Haiti to run the orphanage for the children who are not legally free for adoption, but who are still abandoned and in need of Watkins love! You can follow their adventure here <a href="http://www.mountainstomountains.blogspot.com/">http://www.mountainstomountains.blogspot.com/</a><br />
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Anyhow, I feel badly for the other people who were ready to plop down money on our property, but this gal is ready to go, pre-approved and wants to do the earnest money tomorrow. We've never been lucky in selling property. Heck when the government moved us here in 2003 we barely broke even on our house in Oregon. Then the last house we sold, we actually had to bring a check to closing to pay the difference. Seriously, who ever has to bring money to the closing when you are the SELLER?! <br />
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My hope is that this nest egg will do some good for our kids and the kids who have no one in this world. What the Watkins family is doing is following Christ's example of love to the letter. They are in the place in their life when they are able to go and do what very few others can even contemplate. <br />
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Sometimes, ding bats aren't as dingy as they appear, and by us digging our heels in, we may be able to have some fun and continue to help the country where are hearts are always tugged, Haiti!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-47890793870414388182012-06-15T10:46:00.001-05:002012-06-15T10:48:30.375-05:00Am I missing something here?We have 40 acres of bare land for sale in Wilton, North Dakota. When we bought this land, we planned on building on it and customizing it for our horses. Soon after we bought it, we found this house on 40 acres and it seemed a no-brainer to buy the house we are in since it required much less planning, developing and building.<br />
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Fast forward to today. We have held onto the land as an investment. Land prices in North Dakota are escalating quickly and is at a premium. 40 acre lots are becoming very rare in the Bismarck/Mandan area and in fact we have one of only a handful available for purchase. We have marketed ours well under competitive pieces and against all reason, every time we raise the price we get more interest and offers.<br />
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We currently have two offers. One offer we have agreed upon the price and have given the family a few weeks to get their financing in order. Yesterday we got another offer from a gal who is crazy about the property and has already contacted builders about getting a home constructed on the property. Here's where I am feeling insulted and bewildered. <br />
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She made us a low ball, insulting offer, $35,000 under our asking price. We countered back at full asking price and she replied with, "This really doesn't help us with our payments. We want to stay at a certain payment amount and was thinking you would help us." WTF????? Am I missing something here? Is it our responsibility to help the prospective buyer meet her payments? Then she added, that it's a little further out of Bismarck than they wanted and what about the snowy and icy roads? Um, yeah. That's part of living in North Dakota. <br />
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Am I being dense here? When did it become our responsibility to help the buyer meet their payment comfort level? Look, you either buy it or you don't. Maybe I'll start going through life like this gal. I'll just expect everyone to help me out and make my life easier. Yep, that takes a load off of me. Next time I'm at the grocery store, I'll just tell the checker that the price really doesn't help me stay in my budget and stand there and pout. If any of my kids ever grow up to be this inept, I'll blame, hmmm, everybody else!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-23998478381333036862012-06-08T09:20:00.001-05:002012-06-08T09:20:39.765-05:00Today, because I canToday, simply because I can and the day is already off to a freakish start, I am going to seek out the dark forces and join their hellish crusade. In other words, if I can't beat 'em, I better join them. For the dense people out there, I am referring to my children!Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6394390570479128255.post-39648182664193928802012-06-06T11:11:00.004-05:002012-06-06T11:11:57.887-05:00A composition with heartRichnigthder is my deep thinker. He's quiet and introspective. He always has a lot churning through his brain and sometimes shares those thoughts with me. Today I asked him to write a composition telling me why he was crying in the car yesterday.<br />
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He was sitting in the center row of the car,crying silently. Tears were running down his face and he tried to wipe them away without any of us noticing. I asked him if he would share his thoughts with me and he said yes. Today, those thoughts and emotions came pouring out in his wonderful composition.<br />
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Here it is verbatim, without corrections:<br />
I was sad the other day thinking about Camesuze and Jean. When I was thinking about Camesuze and Jean, I couldn't stop crying until I saw a car that looked like a car from Haiti. I was thinking about the earthquake and I couldn't off my mind. I was thinking about if they were dead. I just couldn't off my mind. I can't wait to go see Haiti again and other people and meet other people. I'm praying to God in bed because I want them alive so we could have a great trip.<br />
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We have been planning a trip to Haiti near the end of the year to begin our search for his birth family. We talk about the trip everyday and how we will start our search. I know he is excited to begin this journey, but also immensely sad to have to face a horrific realization......that his birth family may be dead and lost to us forever. His tender soul is aching to know their fate. We need to know one way or the other. It truly is the not-knowing that is torture.<br />
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Richnigthder tells me frequently that he wants to be a doctor and return to Haiti to help poor people. I'd like to think I can take some credit for his amazing soul, but honestly, the credit goes to his amazing birth parents and God. He is a rare soul and the best Marc and I can do is to continue to nurture it and help him follow the path his birth parents laid out for him.<br />
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Ah, these Haitian kids are amazing kids! Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0